


you show up all hungry-eyed and weather stained...

by okelay



Category: Captain Marvel (Marvel Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-20
Updated: 2018-04-20
Packaged: 2019-04-25 12:05:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14378289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/okelay/pseuds/okelay
Summary: Set sometime after Carol comes back to Earth, where Carol and Jess reunite and try to deal with everything that's happened, try to talk like adults.





	you show up all hungry-eyed and weather stained...

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve been organizing papers and found this old fic. I’d made a list of quotes and prompts and written fics off them. no idea where they came from tbh.  
> it's unbetaed and like a half-baked idea.

Jess was angry. 

she knew it wasnt exactly rational but then neither was she. 

so she kept on being angry. at Carol, at Yon-Rogg, at Tony, at the Guardians, basically everyone.  
She was mad at Carol for leaving, and at everyone else for taking her away from her. from her home. 

 

Tracy was angry too. she didn't like Jess but she didn't complain as much as she used to. she understood.  
She was perpetually angry at the world in general, and now at Carol in particular.

They both felt abandoned.

They didnt talk about it but there was an understanding, and eventually Jess grew to almost like Tracy.  
And then she died.

 

And Carol came back. She wasn't the same woman who left, wasn't the same person as before.  
But still Carol.

 

And despite her complicated feeelings, Jess still loved her. So when she saw her again, her anger faded. Jess went for a hug.  
She said sorry. 

Carol said sorry too. She hugged Jess a year's worth of absence. Whispered about how she'd missed her. 

The world faded away and for a second everything was okay.  
enough to hope.

Then life came back.  
There was a funeral,ashes,a letter, a trip. Things to worry about.

The letter gave Carol perspective.  
Enough to apologise,properly, even for the things she didn't remember.  
And for what she did, like pushing people away.  
Especially Jess.

She sat her down and tried to put it all into words. why she'd left and what she'd learn out in space and how it'd helped and how lonely it had been sometimes and how she much she had missed Jess.  
Told her all the things she had wanted to tell her all that time she'd been away. 

And then Carol said she was ready to listen. wanted Jess to tell her about before.  
Learn the context of her former life, and she wanted details. 

it was a lot for Jess, who'd felt dismissed before.  
Who thought she wanted to yell at Carol but mostly she'd been worried.  
When she'd heard how well she was doing out in space, she'd felt better, but also mad, like she wasn't needed anymore.  
and mad at herself for even thinking that.

To top it all, she still loved her. Still wanted to kiss her, but wasn't sure that was even an option anymore.

It was all very confusing, and Jess wasn't the best at dealing with feelings.  
So when Carol asked her to tell her about before, she felt worried. how much should she tell?  
Carol could see that. She knew there had been things left out before so she asked Jess to tell her everything.  
And Jess did. even though she feared the consequences. She was afraid Carol would walk out on her. Again.

She was in tears by the end, and Jess hated feeling vulnerable.  
But Carol held her tight and kissed her softly. 

"I've been so confused about you and I didn't know why"  
She said "No one would explain what had happened between us"  
She kissed her again, more passionately.  
"Is there any chance we could start over?" she asked  
Jess sniffled  
"I kinda hate you" she said  
"But I'm also pretty sure I can't live without you"

Later, laying next to each other in bed, Carol tried to make sense of her feelings without censure.  
"I did miss you. a lot. I didn't understand it and couldn't explain it.Why it felt like .... I don't know, like there was a hole in my life. I kept feeling like I'd left something behind. did I tell you how sorry I am?"  
Jess smiled "It's okay, I understand now, and space does sound fun"  
Carol smiled back "It had its moments. being the boss of space was a hell of a gig"  
Then she turned to look at her "did I tell you Tic was a big fan? she had so many questions, and I didn't know what to say, and didn't understand why I felt so weird"

Jess chuckled "Well, you've never been the most emotionally self-aware so I'm not surprised. and no you failed to mention that. she does sound like a very sensible young lady"

"She is. we should go visit. she'd love to see you. said you were to be her saviour. didn't know you were mine too"


End file.
